Can’t fit your new credit card in your wallet? Feeling lonely but sick of people? Face hurting from smiling too much? Spoiler alert – Pete has the answers!
Pete there are so many things that really cheese me off at the moment – like wealth inequality, our lack of commitment to carbon emission targets and the treatment of asylum seekers. I really need to get this anger out of my system, but everyone I know agrees with me. This isn’t helping!
Marvin, Yarraville West
Pete says: “What you should do is… Find some new things to be upset about Marvin! You’re beating your head against a brick wall with those issues mate, let’s face it, if you and everyone you know agree they’re wrong, yet nothing has changed, it either means that the powers-that-be don’t care and never will, or that your friends are lying to you and are secretly uber-rich, coal-loving fat cats who yearn for a white Australia! So why not start winging about stuff like gluten free muffins, Game of Thrones fans, and the price of a soy latte. You’ll get all the arguments and grief you seek my friend.
Hi Pete, we had the stupidest thing happen at our place, the remote to our ‘smart’ TV broke and now we literally have no way to turn the television on. What now?
Pete says: “What you should do is… Read the fine print in your ‘smart’ TV manual Mike. Sure, you’ve entered into an agreement to buy a better than average TV, but does it state you will be provided with a ‘smart’ remote control? In my experience remotes are quite dumb and counter-intuitive, so I’d say the mega-corporation has just won another battle with the little guy and you’ll have to buy a new, even ‘smarter’ TV. Sucked in!
Pete we’re loving pomegranate at the moment, but plucking out those seeds, darn it if they dont just fly everywhere and stain everything. But we can’t live without them now – surely there’s a better way?
Pete says: “What you should do is… Calm down Mel. Pomegranates are a superfood, so naturally they are not going to give up their wares easily, but there is a way. You see, like any other fruit or veg, they have their kryptonite, and the best way to retrieve those sweet but desperately slippery and messy little suckers is to get your children to do it! Think about it – smaller fingers, they like mess, they’re cheap labour, and it will keep ‘em occupied for hours! And afterwards they can do some finger-painting.