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    ASK PETE – YOUR FIRST WORLD PROBLEMS SOLVED!

    Date:

    Diligently solving the first world problems of the inhabitants of the inner-west.

    Pete I know this might seem a bit of a strange approach to life, but I actually liked living in isolation. Now that it’s sort of coming to an end, I think I might miss it!

    Steve, Footscray (via email)

    Steve, you are not alone my friend. Before lockdown I had no choice but to go to the shops, visit family, and cavort with friends. Then COVID-19 made it impossible to do any of those things, and after a while I became not just accepting of the situation, but actually quite comfortable with it. Thankfully the risk this virus presents to society is lessening, which means that so too are the restrictions that have been imposed on us. Now what? Well I want to know, who will deliver food and goodies to my doorstep? How will I watch movies and live concerts if they aren’t being piped directly into my living room? Under what circumstances will I ever work again if I have to leave the house and go to some office somewhere? And what about family and friends – do I have to physically socialise again? Yes Steve, I realise you didn’t actually ask any of those questions, but hey, it’s not all about you all the time you know, this is a critical moment in the life of Pete. I feel like the walls of my ivory tower are crumbling, being reduced to rubble along with the fortress that is my superiority complex. Hey – you still there Steve!? Steve? Well thanks for listening buddy…


    Pete, I’m done, can’t take it anymore. For the past two months I’ve had to be chef, cleaner, dog walker, hairdresser, tutor, administrator and motivational speaker – all while working part time. It’s ridiculous, living here in AfDANastan, I haven’t even had time to fish or get back to playing a round of golf. The furthest I’ve got out was a trip to Bunnings. The sooner we are back to normal, the better.

    John, Williamstown North (via email)

    John I would love to say I sympathise with you, but when I woke up this morning do you know what my first thought was? IT’S NOT 1950! You have just described everyday life for many, many people in our community – heroes who soldier on, day after day while the “Johns” of this world enjoy their pub lunches, golf, and complain about how much they have to do. I’ve got only one thing to say to you: next time you’re in Bunnings can you get me a packet of ¼ inch galvanised steel timber screws? This old Pete doesn’t get out much these days…  

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