ASK PETE! YOUR FIRST WORLD PROBLEMS SOLVED

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Happy New Year to everyone… except Pete. Yes folks, he’s back to solve your first world problems.

Pete I made a new year’s resolution to stop telling everyone about my problems… and have broken it already. How can I prepare better for next year?

Adrian, Yarraville (via Facebook)

Adrian I made a pledge one year to stop writing into those modern gurus, you know, the ones that have an answer to everything but at the end of the day, aren’t actually that helpful? But I was incapable of resisting, and since that day all those hundreds and thousands of little snippets of advice have stuck with me, and made me the man I am today. Naturally, when this gig came up, I could hardly refuse, given my extensive experience in pretty much every field of life. But hey, you asked me a question didn’t you? Ha ha just kidding, I figured because you wanted to stop telling people about your problems, the least I could do was pretend I wasn’t listening!


Pete, you may have noticed they scheduled a stack of roadworks for the holiday period, but there’s still this massive pothole in my street which has been there since June! Why?

George, Altona North (via email)

George the answer to your question is best served by this analogy. Have you ever noticed how little Governments do to promote sustainable energy movements like electric cars or solar? Yet they’ll do whatever the can to prop up ‘big oil’ and coal? The reason for this is because they KNOW that every Australian’s dream is to go off-grid, stick it to the man, and be their own lord, and that in the process, we will pick up the slack and invest in all those things anyway, whether the Government does anything about them or not. It’s the same with roads – they know we’ll all get jack of riding the bumps in our local streets, and eventually cave, organise a working bee and fix all the cracks and potholes ourselves. So Frank, stick it to the man and get out there on the weekend with a bucket, shovel and some hot bitumen and fill that sucker in yourself! (Or on second thoughts, maybe do it in the middle of the night).


Hi there Ask Pete. You know the one thing I hate about having holidays at this time of year? Is having to go back to work afterwards – this year we went to Noosa and I was miserable!

Helen, Spotswood (via email)

Helen you have the two things in life that so many people want and need – a job and holidays. The third thing you have is misery, but plenty of people have that too. So if you don’t mind, I’m going to flick your problem on to a colleague of mine – Angry Train Guy – who specialises in travel, work and misery! He may not get back to you since I believe his typewriter is out of action, but if you go back through our previous editions and read his column, I think you’ll find all the answers you seek!

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